Devil

Hi girls!
Morning weight was 65.6. Awesome or what?! I'm sort of back in the zone, even though I bought my favourite white bread yesterday. I dont think I will binge on it anyway. Lived on 3 cups of coffe and ½ a piece of blueberrypie all day, so when P and I were shopping grocerys my body was shaking like it was -50 degrees.. P talked me in to buying the bread, I think he's worried.. I know he is. Well, it's only 5.6 kilo (at first I wrote calories, and could not for my life understand why it looked so wrong) left.

Today I've been eating probably about 600 calories and dinner it yet to come. I'm making it, so I can make it pretty low cal. It'll be no working out for a couple of days now. My throat's all sore.

I'm sorry if you're disgusted by (my) feets.. But this was what my scale showed yesterday morning. I stood there, smiling to myself. 666, like the devil you know? I'm so fucking lame, haha! :)

Favourite thinspo of the moment

I'm so fucking stupid..

Morning weight is 67.1 kgs.. I'm so stupid, so fat and failing. I'm losing motivation a lot latly, which is stupid because I know I only have too look at a ed-related blog and I'll remember what I want. So why dont I read your blogs? I do want to get skinny, do I think it will happen from laying on the couch, eating?!

I want this to change. I've gained a kg since my last post and its noticable.. Good thing I can see it, but bad thing it's on the fucking scale.

A lot of people around me wants to lose weight. Lately they've come to me asking for advise.

I have to study for a while now, but I will be back later today, reading and leaving comments. I WANT to change this!

It's been a while..

And I'm sorry. I've had zero motivation to blog and very rollercoasterlike thoughts about food. Sometimes it feels like I can eat what ever I want, and sometimes I dont even feel bad about it. Most days I eat a little and lose weight. I was 66.1 kgs this morning. = I've lost 31.2 kgs since march 15th. Right now I'm eating a huge bown of yoghurt/granola/raisins for brunch.

I'm scared that I might hurt my muscles working out and not eat "properly".  Sometimes when I'm on the treadmill my stomach hurts so bad, yesterday I even had to get off and lock myself in the bathroom crying for 5 minutes.

I need to get skinny. P and I are leaving january 14th for a week at the Canaries. I need to get bikini-fit. It's not going to be easy cause christmas starts sunday.. We're celebrating (aka eating shit) every sunday 4 weeks before christmas eve. Chocolate all over the place, ugh..

Well.. Schools going great. Life in general is going great. I'm tired a lot though, dont know if it's because it's dark like 24/7 outside or if I'm not eating "enough".

I just wanted to let you guys know how it's going and I'm alive.

bad blogger..

Yesterday I was 68.3 kgs when I woke up, today I was 67.3. When I started march 15th I was 97.3, with makes it a 30 kg loss in 8 months. Not that bad, right? I'm really tired right now and I'm losing hair like a middleaged man.. It freaks me out, I actuallt lose so much hair ALL THE TIME that I'm scared I might get bald soon. If that's not enough I'm getting a cold.

I realized my stomach isn't flatter. I think it's because my skin are sinking back, if you know what I mean? 30 kgs is kind of a lot of fat, so my skin might have been sort of loose.. Well, it's flatter, but I should not be able too see a difference, I think.

P gets home at 8 pm. Yesterday at 7 I was in the bathroom doing the big one and since I thought I wouldn't be long I left the door open. Guess who got home an hour earlier without telling me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bathroom's like the first thing you see when you get home too.. Luckely I managed to close the door just in time, but I was pretty embarrassed and pissed anyway. He just called to tell me he gets here in 10-15 min, and it's 6.40 pm, haha! Good thing is we're sort of used to being disgusting with each other. I had pneumonia summer '10 and I threw up all the time = I had a bucket next to me on the couch aaaaaand a lot of partying = more unintentional purgeing.

I better start making dinner.

a new day

Weekend of eating = 68.3 kgs today. 35 min on the treadmill (-375 cals) and like 5 hours of cleaning our apartment. I've been drinking a proteinshake, a clementine and a slice of white bread with butter, ham and cheese.. Ugh.. Dinner will be a bowl of low fat sour milk with granola and I might allow myself another clementine later this evening. I will still have an okay intake.

Got a new phone, and downloaded a new app for weightloss. It's a fresh start.

It doesn't matter how slowly you go, just as long as you don't stop.

67.9 kg. even though I ate twice yesterday. Happyface! Today I walked to school, down town, and home. Burned about 400 calories. Ate a pear for breakfast and a sandwich for lunch (had to stay after class with 2 others and work on our project) and I will eat dinner too. Thinking a little pasta and some quorn meatballs. No disaster.

Funny thing.. My stomach is a lot flatter. It's really noticable, I can see it. No real change on the scale, but clothes are still loser. I dont really want to eat right now, haha..

Good girl gone bad

Hi girls. I was 68 (wrote 86 at first, haha) kgs this morning, sharp. I've been eating lots and lots today (both lunch and dinner) and I'm hoping it wont be a gain tomorrow.. Like half of my plates were veggies, so it should be okay, right? I cant do anything about it now, anyway. No working out today either.. Sucks when I burned about 950 calories yesterday (and ate.. 500 maximum). But there was no time, I've been doing laundry and studying all day. I got an exam that I have to turn in on friday so I'm reeeeeaaaally busy.